Antonio “Sissy Rebel who Likes Hotels” Trillanes
So let me get this straight.
Trillanes walks of out his trial, dramatically leads a march into the heart of the Makati Business District, practically takes over the Manila Peninsula, calls up all his homies with guns and matching armbands, talks tough, incites a rebellion and then surrenders when the SWAT team throws in tear gas?
I just have to make this clear.
This tough guy ex-soldier with dreams of rebellion, who practically takes a hotel hostage, is afraid of tear gas? WHAT THE FUCK WAS HE EXPECTING? That the government would just roll over while he cleared out the mini-bar? Of course they’re going to throw tear gas! Of course they’re going to show some force! You’re trying to bring down the President! Don’t you fucking watch action movies? What kind of villain surrenders after fucking tear gas?
Trillanes: “Mga Magdalo! Ngayon na ang panahon ng pagbabago! Hindi tayo aatras! Hindi tayo susuko! Mabuhay ang Pilipinas!”
Rebels: “Mabuhay and Magdalo! Mabuhay ang Pilipinas!”
Trillanes: “Pabagsakin si Gloria!”
Rebels: “AWWOOOOO!”
(APC destroys hotel door and SWAT throws in the tear gas)
Trillanes: “PUTANGINA ANO YUN! Naiiyak ako! Wahhhhhh! Wahhhh!”
Rebel #1: “Bosing, tear gas lang yan! Lalaban tayo diba?!”
Trilannes: “Wahhhh! Wahhhh! Ayoko na! Wahhh! Baka masira nails ko.”
Anyway, how unprepared do you have to be to surrender in 5 hours? Oh and more importantly, why is Trillanes even leading this thing? Didn’t he already try and fail a couple of years ago? Even then, it took only a couple of hours. This is going to look bad in his resume. I mean, who’s going to get him to lead rebellions now when both of his attempts were quashed within the day? He just doesn’t seem to be a very good rebel, is all I’m saying. The next time he tries this, the army’s just gonna go, “May coup? Sino leader? Ah si Trillanes? Sige gawa ka muna ng kape.”
Another thing, how gay is it that Trillanes picks hotels for the venue for his bitch fits? I’m no badass rebel leader, but wouldn’t an abandoned warehouse or some historic fort or something have more effect than a 5 star hotel with a gay roman fountain upfront? Apparently he’s only going to rebel if the right amenities are available. No bottle of Perrier and a bubble bath, no coup d’etat. Sorry.
